not me

First: I've had a bad day. It calls for internet whining!! YAAAAAAAY WE ALL LOVE PEOPLE WHO ANGST ON THE INTERNETS, DON'T WE?!

I'd just like to escape my own thoughts. But it's impossible and it feels horrible. I'm stuck inside of my head. It's a cage one can't break out of.

I feel like they don't need me now. No place for me. Not for now.

My head's a big mess. It hurts hurts hurts. Oi, medicine. My guilty pleasure.

Sometimes I feel like I'm no human at all. I think I don't behave like the others. Maybe I'm a robot. Or a species of my own.

I'm violent. I'm impulsive. I'm childish. They don't even know me.

I just wish I had a switch I could turn off. My mind would go all blank and I could be in peace for a moment. All black and silent... No pain, there's nothing. Just wonderful silence and peace of mind.

I want to live. I want to lay on the springlike, bare ground. And just inhale.... exhale.

Oh man, I can't even describe how I feel right now. So, end of story.